The Labubu Craze
A few weeks ago, a friend of ours was over for a couple of vinos and casually mentioned the latest kid-craze: Labubu toys.
These weird little creatures had apparently become all the rage, causing parents everywhere to shake their heads and empty their wallets. My immediate thought: humanity’s more fucked than I thought. But then, smugly, I thought, my kids haven’t asked yet.
Getting Sucked In
Fast forward a couple of weeks, and inevitably, the dreaded plea echoed through our house: "Daddy, I want a Labubu!" I initially brushed it off, convinced these ugly toys were a waste of money.
However, persistence from the little voices wore me down, especially at a particularly weak moment after spending too long in the beer tent at their school fair. Four pints later, my judgment was suitably compromised.
The Price Tag
In my tipsy enthusiasm, I quickly Googled Labubu and thought I’d found a reliable retailer and stumbled onto Popmart-or so I thought. Two cuddly Labubu toys and delivery later, I'd spent £91. With Moretti running through my veins, this seemed reasonable.
I quietly clicked ‘Buy’ and prayed no one would notice, especially after recently enduring ridicule from my wife for spending £23 on Sephora lip gloss for our 10-year-old just a couple of weeks earlier.
But this was way worse.
Excited Anticipation Turns Sour
For weeks, the kids eagerly checked our delivery/shoe box, excitement building. But when the toys didn't promptly appear, I resigned myself to having been scammed which was perhaps in hindsight preferable to actually receiving the overpriced, hideous creatures.
Eventually, they arrived 3 weeks later. My youngest was ecstatic; my eldest was unimpressed. Within days, both had lost interest entirely, the toys left ignored, abandoned, and utterly unloved. I was secretly annoyed with my kids but quickly found out why these furry fake imposters were chucked aside.
The Twist: Fake Labubus (aka Lafufus)
I posted these on my story and had a few people say they were fake. I thought they couldn’t be, as I purchased from Popmart, but then I discovered the horrifying truth. I'd confidently purchased from "Labubu-Popmart.com"-which ChatGPT mercilessly rated 1.9/5. My suspicions confirmed: I'd bought fake Labubus (now humorously dubbed Lafufus).
Sheepishly, I broke the news to the kids, only for them to bluntly reply…
"We know. We realized as soon as we opened them."
Ouch.
So not only did I spend £91 on two cuddly toys-they were fake cuddly toys. I have since learnt that the real ones are much cheaper.
What a spectacular waste-and what a spectacular idiot.
If you do anything today, please don’t be as stupid as this.
